I'm not good with allowances when I read fic. I suck at supending my disbelief.
I'm actually pretty good at it if a story makes me want to. If there's something to the story that I want enough, I can overlook a number of things--humor, for example, does this for me. A funny story will seduce me into stretching my willingness to go along more than any other type. In this fandom, I'd already been talking somewhere about wanting something darker, a believable darkish scenario that centered on the relationship between John and Rodney and not just the circumstances. And then along came Taf with this story, which hit the spot for me. So all that leaves me wondering how much is the story working for me, and how much is me wanting the story to work. It's fairly difficult for me to step back from this one and evaluate the parts, because I want the whole.
I brought a John/Rodney slasher POV into this one, so I'm all set for Rodney to notice John, to focus a lot of attention on him even though his sexual focus is on Teyla. Even in non-slash I look for the attraction between the two of them, so I'm predisposed to go with Rodney picking up on anything to do with John. You come at it from a different POV and see Rodney's focus on John, in this situation, as too intense. That's interesting--I hadn't thought to examine that, before.
The Rodney characterization was probably the one that I felt was least strong, but I didn't have much difficulty with it in part because I tended to follow his focus to the other characters. And I allowed the extreme situation to convince me of a Rodney who was more confident in this situation (with Teyla) than the eps have led us to think he might be with women. Maybe he's socially clumsy with women, but once he's in bed with one, he's a machine. *g* Hey, he could be, in a "geeks try harder" sort of way. (/Revenge of the Nerds flashback) Desperation, grog and that what-the-hell feeling that might come from two days of terror all work toward this Rodney, for me. There was some author-voice happening in Rodney's characterization, yes, but not so much or so not-Rodney, for me, that it bothered me. I'm good with him being self-aware; I don't think he's blind to his own internal workings, I think he mostly doesn't take the time to go into it.
Shep has a couple of hitches too, I think, cause he's dark, but that other flyboy side he uses to hide the darkness never shows up.
I think I'd have been thrown out if he had, or at least if he had anywhere but the end. I think we saw some of that in what Rodney saw, the push/pull of John the savage/John the leader happening. If he'd been more himself, more compassionate, at the end, though, the final lines would have lost some impact. I like the coldness, there. He didn't seem, to me, to be as much punishing them (though I think there was a little of that) as trying to reconnect, just reacting, and wanting, but still keeping that distance. He's not going to jump on the bed with them and ask, "me, too?" or "we get to go home, now--party!" because of what he is and because I don't think he'd feel right or secure in doing that, but the wild thing in him is doing it in a different way, participating from this different place. And maybe his blood's really up, maybe the high is turning him on, and maybe that does things to him, too. We don't know exactly what's going on in John's head, but I find the way it plays out fascinating so I don't mind not knowing, I like speculating.
For me, this was a very cool look at John, but it was Rodney's story, and what happened to him and where he's at when the story closes is more different from where he started than where John went. I imagine John as having gone here before, I think of his past military career and Afghanistan and can see it. Rodney's definitely the focus, for me, by the end of the story.
no subject
I'm actually pretty good at it if a story makes me want to. If there's something to the story that I want enough, I can overlook a number of things--humor, for example, does this for me. A funny story will seduce me into stretching my willingness to go along more than any other type. In this fandom, I'd already been talking somewhere about wanting something darker, a believable darkish scenario that centered on the relationship between John and Rodney and not just the circumstances. And then along came Taf with this story, which hit the spot for me. So all that leaves me wondering how much is the story working for me, and how much is me wanting the story to work. It's fairly difficult for me to step back from this one and evaluate the parts, because I want the whole.
I brought a John/Rodney slasher POV into this one, so I'm all set for Rodney to notice John, to focus a lot of attention on him even though his sexual focus is on Teyla. Even in non-slash I look for the attraction between the two of them, so I'm predisposed to go with Rodney picking up on anything to do with John. You come at it from a different POV and see Rodney's focus on John, in this situation, as too intense. That's interesting--I hadn't thought to examine that, before.
The Rodney characterization was probably the one that I felt was least strong, but I didn't have much difficulty with it in part because I tended to follow his focus to the other characters. And I allowed the extreme situation to convince me of a Rodney who was more confident in this situation (with Teyla) than the eps have led us to think he might be with women. Maybe he's socially clumsy with women, but once he's in bed with one, he's a machine. *g* Hey, he could be, in a "geeks try harder" sort of way. (/Revenge of the Nerds flashback) Desperation, grog and that what-the-hell feeling that might come from two days of terror all work toward this Rodney, for me. There was some author-voice happening in Rodney's characterization, yes, but not so much or so not-Rodney, for me, that it bothered me. I'm good with him being self-aware; I don't think he's blind to his own internal workings, I think he mostly doesn't take the time to go into it.
Shep has a couple of hitches too, I think, cause he's dark, but that other flyboy side he uses to hide the darkness never shows up.
I think I'd have been thrown out if he had, or at least if he had anywhere but the end. I think we saw some of that in what Rodney saw, the push/pull of John the savage/John the leader happening. If he'd been more himself, more compassionate, at the end, though, the final lines would have lost some impact. I like the coldness, there. He didn't seem, to me, to be as much punishing them (though I think there was a little of that) as trying to reconnect, just reacting, and wanting, but still keeping that distance. He's not going to jump on the bed with them and ask, "me, too?" or "we get to go home, now--party!" because of what he is and because I don't think he'd feel right or secure in doing that, but the wild thing in him is doing it in a different way, participating from this different place. And maybe his blood's really up, maybe the high is turning him on, and maybe that does things to him, too. We don't know exactly what's going on in John's head, but I find the way it plays out fascinating so I don't mind not knowing, I like speculating.
For me, this was a very cool look at John, but it was Rodney's story, and what happened to him and where he's at when the story closes is more different from where he started than where John went. I imagine John as having gone here before, I think of his past military career and Afghanistan and can see it. Rodney's definitely the focus, for me, by the end of the story.