didn't see Hindsight Rodney as quite the extreme you've described above. I did see depth, nerves, genuine affection

Me too. He was slightly too strident for my taste, but only slightly.

I also didn't feel like Shep was "played" into the relationship. He seemed to sort of let it happen, but that's different.

And I can imagine McKay calling Shep many times a day. He's dogged, persistent, and obsessive.